Hello my loyal readers, my new readers, my online world… Hello!
I guess I have to get in line to echo “What a year!” with all of you – an echo heard round our worlds. My first blog of 2024 was titled “Decisions”. It ends with the line “Am I there yet?” Well, guess not even yet a whole year later.
What happened to 2024? I “lost” my job in the midst of a great shuffle from semi-organized to the Witch from Miami’s takeover of the church & driving out most of the congregation I started the year with. It may have been Biblical, but only in the sense that she enacted that driving the moneylenders out of the temple part… only they weren’t such.
But I was lucky – I at least got a luncheon with friends & supporters before walking out of my own accord – unlike earlier & later employees, one of whom was threatened with a police escort by the Board President. What lies heavier on a church…financial or spiritual debt?
I got a new car & we tiptoe around town still discovering conversation. I settled more into the apartment where I live. I made many resolutions & kept about 65% of ’em. I burned candles, sage, poems, bridges… I moved heaven & earth only to find the same under the Big Blue Marble as atop it. Where once I approached change eagerly, I now drag my sore feet, tucking in my head like a turtle to survey the lay of the land before venturing forward. I learned there are no safe spaces needed; I am in the hands of Universe all & every. Just need to make sure the shoelaces are tied.
For the last day of this year, I pulled out all my oracles. They pretty much say the same thing. All the arrows point in the same directions: health, self-care-taking, some stargazing, much release, more adventure. I got the words: Confidence, Kindness, Evolving, Radical (rootedness), Generous. I got the angels of abundance, adventure, release, vision, strength. I drew the cards for contemplation, huge change, vision, strength. I drew from the Motherpeace deck: vision, self-solidity, wariness/awareness, contemplation, [again] change. My Southwest Oracle deck rendered tortoise, starry skies, yucca, mullein, tumbleweed, desert moon – all indicators of what is listed just above. Louise Hay advised centering, new life to be whole, release, being part of Everything by just being me.
I can’t decide if the message is repetitive or insistent. Actually, it’s both!
I start as I ended & vice-versa, no?
What did I learn this year? I learned my heart is more resilient than my brain. I learned my liver & spleen can renew & change their emotional charges more easily than my feet which drag when they should dance. I learned living up to my promises is hard only when they’re made to myself. I keep the outer ones way more easily. I learned I am often the last in my own line to learn & to love. There’s no emotion tied to it all – just learning.
I learned all of this in many renditions, each situation earning another notch on the climbing ladder, each rung bringing a loftier view into range. I learned perhaps more than I wanted about teeth, betrayal, sanctions, the effects of change & the need for peaceful acceptance. All’s I can really do is straighten the tablecloth the cards are dealt on.
Outside, the first firecrackers pop in the distance. Night blankets the land. I run the usual questions: did I lock the car (go push the remote til it honks), did I remember to do everything I wanted to do today? Yeh, pretty much I did. I changed the cat litter, brought out the trash & recycle. I vacuumed & washed down my favorite chair. I checked the brand-new phone for messages as I now check my head for the same. I’m out of books to read – the library was closed at 2 when I popped by. All I have left are the books I promised to read at the beginning of 2024 & now, the time to read these.
I wish for you whatever it is you most wish for yourself! It won’t get any better than that.
More later.
Love now.
Carol

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