What To Do With Rage?

I made a mistake at work. I told the village mouthpiece/handyman something which would have been better kept confidential. He repeated my confidence – I should have known. Should I have known? Yes, I cannot escape this easily. I should have known, but in the moment…

We have a Board Member who’s go-to state is simmering hate & disdain – the ever-active nose-up fishwife. She called to ask about the info, but I refused to tell her, asking her to wait til the manager returned Monday. (The return of discretion, with poor timing.)

“But you told so’n’so! I AM YOUR BOSS! You will tell me now what I want to know! “I am writing you up for insubordination!” I AM A BOARD MEMBER!

I said let me make a call to check this & I called the Board President, explained my dilemma. She said go ahead & tell her. “You shouldn’t have shared it in the first place.” Yes, I now know that but it was a silly mistake. And I made it. I told the Prez to expect a letter & keep a fire extinguisher nearby or maybe at least a roll of TP for the shitstorm to follow.

Back to rage. I simmered for awhile on my own. I called the mouth & asked WTF? He apologized for five minutes straight. Another futility exercise.

I planned what I would say, my response full of knives I would toss at this woman while she spun on a wheel, each one falling short of injury, but each a gasp from some appreciatve imaginary audience. The first was “Need any help spelling insubordination?”

I worried for about ten minutes on the sheer discommode of changing jobs, getting back on the Indeed.Com flesh market. Oh Lordy.

I called her back to give her the info.

“How dare you? I Am A Board Member! I am your boss! I am writing you up!

I said, “Write your letter. I won’t listen to you hollering at me.” And pushed the button, searching briefly for the blocking feature, then thought better. She is, after all, a Board Member.

After rubbing the sore spot awhile, I decided to write it out. I always get great responses to my Letters to Universe & this one did not disappoint:

“Be Peace,” they said. “We will hold your hand thru any embarrassment & hold them both if necessary to keep you from strangling her. She is  not beyond redemption, nor are you, but you must discover this for yourself & thus for the both of you.“

Time to walk the talk.