The ineffable result of a well-lived life – the re-entry into the Flow going in the same direction. Shipping the oars to grip the rudder. Ahh. Sweet surrender.

It has taken me too long to discover that this is the most natural of states. I haven’t been successful fighting much, after all. Neither gravity nor gravitas can be wrestled to the ground. Only joy lifts & frees me into at atmosphere where I can breathe easily & with true thanks.

Some think telling the same tale of woe & awfulness will bring themslves & others there, too. I take off across the country & a friend tells me of the times she almost died on the road. I felt horrible for miles & am still shaking that off. In the end, it was only an experience of her imagination; resulting in a rehearsed tale of what I preceive as entrenched fear on her part, & a nasty perception of danger whispered in my unwitting ear. She would argue, no, no, no, that’s not what I’m saying. I would reply, then why tell me this? What positive accomplishment results?

Repetition is a kind of surrender. For me, reapplication of the old in support & attempted discovery of the new works well. Returning to a place where I have lived & loved & left in all good faith is not a way of saying, Well, folks, that new thing I left here for didn’t work. It is a how-to of life to say I’m re-turning to the place wherre once upon a time, it all worked better. Be it hindsight or foresight, it’s what I see.

I mean, everything works until it doesn’t. The attributes change, that who, what, where, why, and when, are all scrambled in their own shell game. Really, I’m only guessing at a future to be lived in love. But it’s my best guess so far – as were they all. I do expect my tiny light to be bright enough to perceive all the vagaries of living in this deceptive, 3D world. I call it the ‘one candle in the dark room’ solution.

And so it has been & must be, for me. I’m unsure of any way to live in surety. ACIM will tell me – as every other recovery meme – let go, let God. But it’s the God in us making the choices, our personal interpretation of the Big God Out There. Who’s to say what will work in a world so out of true it is seems out of Truth entirely?

I had wonderful times & wondrous experiences in Sarasota. I had as much as I could master & muster & constantly combed what I had for more. Putting that experience into the rear view does not undo what I excerpted from it, yeh? How many vortexes can I live in without becoming dizzy? They draw me in & sling me out in a yo ho ho & away we go fashion.

Here’s your hat, what’s your hurry? They say. Don’t forget your teeth or your glasses. For apparently, the rest of your life isn’t long enough to replace what came before with something newer, brighter, shinier. We only think it so.

For me, I return to a once-lived life, the possibility of a used job, an old idea with a new frame of reference & as my tale-telling friend above brings forward: You’re not the same person you were when you left there. Apparently, my newly-hatched version of old-self must suffice.

What works best is to perceive all as new, as innocent, as non-threatening. Don’t forget to see the grace & wonder in every breath taken to the bottom of the lungs, where it touches upon a song of thanks. Then breathe that out to the known World. Boundless creativity results, grander interpretations encourage growth. Surrender doesn’t imply rolling over, but interpretive acceptance. New filters accompany new thoughts, even to old places. It is up to me to re-create my world as each shell is lifted: who? what? where? why? when?

Guess what? It’s Me Again. Shall we dance?