Footfalls

Gently, so gently do I touch love

The petal of a flower

With a tendency to curl into protection

Most tenderly I offer a wish, a promise, a longing

Turned into yearning, if I gaze too long upon it.

I am firm. Resolute. I will not disturb this seedling

Except to offer the water of my prayers.

——————————–

Who knows where our perceptions may bring us?

To what tall doors opening

Into adventure or amorous murmurs?

I am familiar with this dance; the steps never leave.

I am not like her; not frail, nor sickly

I am an ocean after you have tended a mountain rill…

There are mysterious depths here, a rush of saline

A holy path to follow to fulfillment

But I see you patting love down as you would a stray kitten

While I am the panther, curled upon plateaus of rock.

When it is time, we shall meet on terms of strength

In skies filled with wind,

We will open wings & fly

Be where you need to be for now

I have our future well in hand.

 ————————

I am daydreaming about being in love. What is happening here? What am I doing? What stray magic has padded in like a cat, curling its tail around my heart?

 So much is going so well, why not? Why deprive myself of a dream when being awake might bring the same thing? why else are we placed in each other’s path, except to love & become the Beloved?

 Yet I know nothing; love drives out all knowledge. What went before is erased, a film laid over the past to be rewritten, reworked, resumed at another chord.

 Don’t listen to me. It is nothing, this tiny blossom, delicate as a wish…a sturdy mountain flower bright in color against a desert sea of sky.

 I will tell none but you & my journal of this. Shh. Like oiling the tin man, this nourishes my heart. Unfolding an origami uncovers all the wrinkles; new patterns display, thoughts of never knowing this again are smoothed away. How does this happen except as a miracle patterned upon the sacred in life?

 There is nothing here but a whisper about to become a song…a melody drawing a bow across heartstrings long bundled in silk.

 O Lord.

Carol

 

 

 

The Collective of Silence

THE COLLECTIVE OF STILLNESS

There’s not far to go before the land starts insisting

I am alive in every place I stand

The telepathy of clouds

Drawing my face to the sky

The valley bows to my feet

The Rock People watching.

——-

I am listening as hard as I can to the Silence

My ears so still (no cilia vibrating)

No sound save Eternity

Settling in for the long run.

——

Earth whispers to me of immortality

Longing to be a poem

It tells me to take it everywhere

That water-meadow in Wisconsin

Chesapeake Bay largesse

The stone-poems of rock nearby

An unchanging safety

Waiting to claim all flesh

I am immortal as I can be in this moment

The activation of love in a grain of sand.

———

The spare skeleton remains; a lace & calcium poem

Yellow-white teeth resembling long-bone toes

I will be blanched

Gnawed by coyote cubs, dragged, growling, to dens

Sung into sunrise: danced on four legs

——–

Roadside flowers

Visible only en masse

A color smudging the landscape

Wreathing no arches

Serving as Butterfly’s foothold

Nectar in a bitter landscape.

——–

 

Aging to Perfection…

Mortality / Schmortality

Third person me

She walks with the confidence

Of a big-breasted woman

35 a dim echo as its double approaches

No long gray tresses here,

But short, sharp spikes

For the divine connection.

 

Thick around her center

Description: Rubenesque

Undefined by Twiggy-standards

A short, Italian fireplug of female

Passions wrapped in brain & heart;

Sharp-tongued, less than tolerant…

Strong hands, a wrinkly smile

Entering her eyes first.

 

She’s tasted risk & lived on love

Fearless, present; a solid woman

Ready for the next act

The third trimester of

Maiden, mother, crone.

 

Age Happens

Long after youth has fled the parade

Life lengthens beyond

Childhood

Adolescence

Adulthood

An unerring arrival (never expected)

It takes up residence

In spots, in strangely-shaped vein whorls.

It’s a celebration & a culmination

A triumph & a terror –

Not that it will end poorly,

But that it may not be well-accomplished.

 

The Divine Miss B

Age is the last factor of life

Positive on the balance sheet

But only after you’ve gotten past

All other negotiations.

 

At first, it was a nuisance

I asked for laugh wrinkles, but this?

Ridiculous!

The 50’s slipped by

The 60’s kind of danced along

Now, here I stand at 70:

The threshold of being Born Again

Having it finally, my way.

 

Being able to ignore the life-beast

Or take it to bed,

Suck it dry:

I rise triumphant!

 

My birthday hides in September

I have tried, am trying, to pay my debts

To be faithful to the oligarchs

Who file their nails at my door

Yawning as they await their monthly checks.

I have a Final Solution for you all…

It might be the best payment I can come up with…

When I am dead, someone scatter my ashes

In front of the banks.

 

 

 

Hooks On Heaven

SET MY HOOKS ON HEAVEN’S RIM

Prayer over prayer, I climb

Searching in wonder for whomever therein dwells

Lords & ladies?

Saints, angels…

Crossing rainbows latticed of beliefs

Buttressed by Faith

This is harder than I thought:

Escaping humanity

While wearing a skinsuit!

 

GOD’S BEARD

I’ve never lacked fortitude or fortune

Promised God in every encounter

I examine each for divine traces

Sometimes finding only one gray hair.

 

8 A.M./FRIDAY THE THIRTEENTH

The hot, fierce light of New Mexico

Seasoned by overcast

To a blend of blessing-cool

A morning to sit outside

Traffic blowing by in purposeful wind

Life catching its breath

For one more day on Planet Earth

 

TRUE/FALSE

Who can trust wisdom anymore?

That of the ages is pop-stuff now

Our minds are far beyond the tenets

Deep in personal responsibility

Dig in, my Soul, find the

Traction of grace

Levity of blessing

Spores of holiness…

Follow the perfume of angels a-wing

Orient towards the Divine

It’s the scent of love

Fresh-baked & set

Upon an open windowsill

Of a morning.

 

CREATION (Two Views)

Father

I wonder if God donned an apron

Then set to shape the World.

Dusted His hands in flour & water

Before patting up the clay…

Could be He set us up along the

Fence ‘round Heaven

Walking down the line

Breathing out

Blowing us into the twice-blessed world.

I like that He clapped us up out of nothing

Cobbled up a world to home us

Blessed it blue & brown

Setting our souls a-wing into space-time.

 

Mother

Maybe a Mother made us

Searching the rag-bag pile

For scraps in red & yellow,

Tan & black…

Pulling these free &

Settling on a stool to

Fill a whimsy.

How lovingly she worked,

Symmetrical & shapely –

Imagine us, the source of Her delight

As we began our Song of Thanks…

Her affection captured, She

Fell to earnest Creation:

A world for us to dwell upon

Creatures to ride & roar & race

Greens to eat

God! She thought of everything!

Even water to get us clean again,

Brains to continue in personal conceivings,

Hearts to love…

Then up to bed She went

And in the morning, we were gone.

 

 

 

Dancin’ with my shadow

Dancing with my shadow

Down the middle of the street

With my headphones as antennae

And that Pentatonix beat

Tagged by madness, yes, and music

And my shadow twelve foot tall

All the drivers checking mirrors

Other walkers at a crawl

But I just can’t help it, darlin!

Wish that you could hear it too!

Cuz if this beat all grabbed your feet

Your arms would feel it, too…

So, if you see me on the corner

To the left or to the right

I’m just dancin’ with my shadow

N I may be here all night!

Friends No More: A Parting

Disparate Heart

Made of thorns & parry

I thought you better than this

Moved to pity & then Toledo steel

Bladed with desire

Cutting through love

Looking for yourself in the openings

But this you are already too full of!

You understand so little

Stopped short of full tide

Withholding the forward of completion

Gentle heart, will I take you in compassion?

Shall I find you a nest of ordinary love

Wherein to rest? And, then, will you so?

We have parted a year ago

Your proud blade & I

We have discovered many centers

Many sendings.

We yearn to be the ocean

Covering a high-tided beach

Once more…

 

It Wasn’t A Dream

I moved one small thing

and the world of dust behind it

came to light.

So it is in life:

I peered behind one thought

Into a world of teeth & claws.

How many times to clear this?

As many as it may take, perhaps?

 

Barrier Reef

Protecting the tender lagoon of love

Tidal & green inside

Brimming with schools of thought

Flashing in a silver unison of silence.

I will no predator among them,

Coral & Carol interchanged

My bones all unseen

And as beautiful.

 

Briefly Then

I’ll tell you the story of my life:

I Am. That’s about it for now.

Oh, you want details?

I have been advised to not follow advice

I have been told to sing, but practice silence

To run, but now, to sit-stay

To love “in cautious abandon.”

Whom shall I believe?

Who shows me the reality of hard-packed dirt

Advising me to see only stars?

Allow me just a momentary hug

Heart-to-heart,

An angel wrapping wings around a tree.

I have lived so long on so little love

I am beyond existence.

 

Parallels

I have news for you

These double lines that merge in the distant vision

Don’t merge.

I assure you – it’s a mirage.

For as long as they go together

Somewhere they part

They encounter division

Become singular of purpose

Each no longer the other’s destination

 

It Is Time

Oh, I have clung to you

Like a child her child’s blanket

It is now to set you down

A dried pen I’ve shaken hard for ink.

I’ve run downhill on our friendship

Now out of fuel, spent completely

Yes, time & past time, months of days

We were to have together

You swept from the calendar

And folded your arms.

Our years are dry as kindling

Our friendship lost in conflagration

A wildfire of no know etiology

One careless match-word

All is now ash.

I’ve poked & prodded with my mind

For reasons for reasonableness

Yet there are none hidden here

None to be had

So let’s say not farewell

but say goodbye.

I brush my hands of loving  you

I did all I thought right

While being only wrong.

 

No Light

Bring on the unlit darkness

the moveless tide

the ink all fades in loveletters anyway.

This burden of relief a wonder.

Once emptiness to fill, now fallow space

This ravished ground

 

Stupid

It was a turnkey operation

Our being friends

Immediately, I offered entry

Together, we closed the door to others

And tho I wondered where, at times, you went

We found each other at need.

Your many truths were also false

Perhaps mine, only returned?

Your final insult wormed around my edges

Not quite belonging, yet taken in…

The door flung open, invited exit.

I prowled outside, peering in windows

Rattling doorknobs.

I’ve salvaged from the shed,

Made myself a hobo bag I shall not carry long

I leave you to your limping life.

Striding through the white picket fence,

I close & latch the gate.

 

So Long

This is the last of you

Out of my heart, I say

Your scruff & hind in my hands

One more time

I toss you from the environs of my heart

Your compass after – find me no more!

I clap my hands

And watch you disappear!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

llll

The Journey of No Arrival

SLEEPING INTO AWAKENING

I was far away this morning

Understanding inevitability.

In the dream, two men were each my beloved

Of intellect & individuated thought

Each held mighty concepts easily

In both mind & sinew.

They welcomed me upon my approach

I traveled with them, offering

My sable-brushed ideas,

Fearful of being trite

Yet moved by the power to put together

Theirs & mine

For the wholeness this offered.

We came upon my car, trunk open, battery exposed

I knew this necessary. I knew if I left it, it would not stay.

I even recognized where I was

My dwelling behind a building

Where the vista opened

To reflective rivers, unhesitating

From which I’d learned the same.

I returned to my sleeping body

Puzzling to awaken in it

Felt the net of Ordinary descend.

I opened the door & stepped into darkness,

Where all the streetlamps were haloed

Soft, somnolent, unawake.

Even drinking my coffee

I could not tell which reality was mine.

 

NEXT

We are seldom ready for the unmaking of our worlds

Imagine the shout of surprise to find earth flat

As an underlying conspiracy!

But wake, we must, indubitably

If the future is dystopian, we will accustom to canned foods.

If we create our new reality,

Let’s opt for fields & fruit trees, for fertile grain

Let us see the clean bright shining

Even in the bowels of carven buildings

There’s no time for moving rearward

We all stare into this brave new world

When only by moving forward we bring it.

 

THE SITTING MUSE

I wake with poetry before commonsense

I seem to have fallen asleep on her shoulder

Listening to nursery rhymes spun of philosophy

Turning routine to raw talent

We share her vistas

Our inside eyes are staring

Even as my baby browns are fogged.

Coffee is not the usual scalpel of habit

Cleaving the mysteries of dreams.

I settle against her once more

She replaces her arms about me

She sings.

 

NO GUARDRAILS

Why are edges so seductive?

These places where worlds end & air begins

Where elements switch up reality & realty

The sky pushes against the land

Pressing down upon the water below.

My mind has become a wildlife sanctuary

Flashing brilliant feathers among branches

Lifted & lowered in a dance

Blow-through winds are dusted with dreams,

I breathe your breath, World,

I take part as I partake.

 

THE JOURNEY OF NO ARRIVAL

(a/k/a The Flow)

If I were done, I’d be there,

If I declare “mission accomplished”

Before I arrive

I reveal my ignorance

Of impending law.

I didn’t make a vow to bring closure

Only to carry it forward awhile.

I do, at times, believe in the world

Carried forward on the back of a turtle

Ponderous, amphibian, patterned in an eternal mandala

The land seems such slow going

Then we enter the water –

All grace & blessing

All ease with little effort

Until Eternity grows more shallow

Joining carefully with the land.

 

NEVERBEEN & NEVERWAS

I could use some new rituals

To replace these old habits

Help me peel away this tough exterior

To the tenderness within

To the succulence of loving all I see

Married to all I am

Seamlessly enjoining all I do.

Let the world, as such, infect me

Believe in me as I do her

Take provenance in my revelation:

The heart unveils the center

Expansion nourishes.

And if this is different, O Knowing Ones,

Let me silently decompose

One more absorption.

I dream of ascension

When the truth is I can hardly jump for joy

One step forward at a time…

I prefer to run down mountains

When success is achieved climbing them

Ah, human’s nature is a beloved backwoods

Overgrown & overblown with “what’s worst will happen”

Let’s turn this thing around!

Retrace our path as we re-turn to Love.

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