Being Again

I have changed up my luck & my life many times, not being one to stay in place & talk while change happened all around. I’m at that lever point again where each choice takes me to a more fulfilling place.

Mark, 5:36 says “Do not fear. Only believe.” Whew! Good advice there! I’ve taken it on as a mantra & with gratitude for the “holy backup.”

I had no expectations on coming to Florida, really not knowing what I’d discover here. My new roommate did not quiz me on wants or needs to bring attention, I did not put expectations out there, except for it to be different from what I was/had/did in T or C.

These differences are astronomical. Yesterday in a meeting about literacy, we played a game based on Jeopardy & one of the questions was which state has the lowest level of literacy in U.S. I mumbled “What is New Mexico.” I was correct. Ineffably sad to me when someone cannot read or write, I am remedying this by joining the Literacy Council & training as a tutor.

I genuflected on going into the library – more of a church to me than all else. The staffers here everywhere are positive, helpful, genuine & creative. I’ve been able to afford new glasses at an optometry store – a dream of years but since last pair cost $500, seemingly far out of reach. I have a wall of books available in the Community Center here. I have a church family now to make laugh since that’s my favorite thing. And people are so ready to laugh!

Seems like pretty much everything is readily available here which was more of a rumor in T or C. All kinds of community facilities & events, long walks by water, Time & more to recreate my life & offer my unique talents to a place & an appreciative populace. For me, service is the essential of my being, as needed as all else.

For the poverty I saw across the country, the empty storefronts & sagging signs, from the fast-food-only offerings to fresh greens & meats, for lawns without rusted hot water heaters & garages full of bulging, mottled boxes, for the well-tended pets & the lack of hungry cats crowding the yards… It is an unexpected lift to my life-spirits to be in a place where it all I see is organized & tended. Of course there are still many living in their iPhones or intent only on passing the next car on the road. But these seem echoes faint & faraway to my observations. Florida is a state of mind as well as method. I anticipate establishing myself in the community & moving forward to a much higher & more loving state of knowledge, aiming for enlightenment.

My loving nature is expressed by all the writing I do. I bring to light stories about myself which will place them in the heart of a wondrous, organized universe that makes butterflies in larvae, that grows mighty sequoias from one tiny hold-in-you-hand “seed.” I live in a place where my now is for the benefit of others & the betterment of self. My stories help others achieve their goals, release their fears, understand more of what happened. All my friends & lovers are in a place of sending me joy & delight when they think of my name, my face, my voice. I return these tenfold, understanding that Love is the nature of the universe in which I dwell & have my being. I reflect & release any event or thought which does not fit into this pattern of affection, unfoldment & endorsement of my understanding of God & Divinity which showers upon me unceasingly with a blink & a wink & a blessing of smiling energy. And so it is!

My poetry Muse has gone to the nearby beach but she’ll be back. In the meantime I write prose & praise & power as I grow into this now, this new. Late in life for it all, this is, but here & now counts for far more than lottery winnings if you’re happy.

Be in love, people. If you’re not, take any train, boat, plane or scooter you can to get there. Then turn around & show everyone else the way.

Love,

Carol

4 thoughts on “Being Again

    1. Feel like I’m “upleveling” on so many fronts. The poetry has taken a hiatus but the prose is coming to Niagara levels. I am having such fun with saying I’m from T or C cuz nobody believes there’s a town with that name. Have told the Ralph Edwards story 4x in 2 days. Yesterday I cracked up a whole group meeting with our town motto “All here cuz we’re not all there.” Feel like I’m coming into life, not just coming TO life. Thanks so much for your good wishes, Jeff!

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  1. Carol, I wasn’t able to leave a comment so here’s what I wrote.

    I’m so happy for you, Carol. Your journal chronicling your trip to Florida has inspired me to do some of the things you are doing. I was never a church goer but there’s a Unity church in Cruces which I will visit Sunday. The minister once lived at Findhorn. That’s recommendation enough for me. Got my library card. My mantras have been and continue to be, “All is well,” “Everything is love,” and “We are all magnificent.” I’m sorry to tell you that Stella and I are getting a divorce, hence my move to a studio apartment in Cruces. I believe the blames lies with us both, but I’m happy to shoulder the larger portion. I love you, dear. Take care and have fun and stay happy.

    Sent from my iPad

    >

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  2. Good to hear from you, Carol. Happy to hear of your joyful new beginnings. As has been said, “Today is the first day of the rest of your life.” You have shown that in your own life. As you have chosen to make each day a better day, it is being done unto you. How we name it, is how we will claim it. As we name each day a good day, it will be so for us, because we have willed it thus by claiming it that way.

    It is as Jesus taught us, when he was healing people. He didn’t say it was done unto them as he believed, nor as God believes, nor as anyone else believes. He said it was done unto them “as thou hast believed” (as they believed). That’s because we’re the only chooser, the only namer, in our life. It is as we will it, regardless of how we’re willing it. So it behooves us to remain ever conscious and deliberate about how we’re naming our day, as a good day or a bad day, for how we name it, we also claim it. That’s how we can continue enjoying the name it/claim it game.

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